As Black women, we’ve spent our lives witnessing our mothers, matriarchs and mentors be strong and sturdy, like rocks. And we aspire to be like them daily.
We frequently hear from our families and friends. “You’re strong,” or “you’ve been through storms before,” or “you just have to pray and trust God.”
You probably have five tabs open on your browser, (BTW, I have a solution for that), a bazillion emails that require responses, errands to run, functions to attend, appointments to keep, gym time to log (wait, you haven’t been to the gym?), a demanding family and a Boss to answer to. And a long list of to do’s that goes on for ever and ever and ever.
If only you had some time.
But, you don’t have time for anything.
In fact, you barely have time to read this. (And I barely had time to write it.)
At what point did our lives turn into a never-ending to do list, where the work is never done and we are never done?
And at what point did we become okay with it?–
Well guess what, you’re not superwoman.
Your physical and mental health is important.
You need to take care of you, before you can take care of others.
The peculiar thing about doing the work to uplift others is, the world often forgets that you also need uplifting, and the weight becomes heavy.
Self-care is a divine responsibility.
Since there’s always going to be something else to do, forever and ever, it’s logical to conclude that it’s impossible to ever get everything done.
Superwoman. Take several seats. Put down your cape.
Yes, I’m talking to you.
Stop doing things on autopilot. Stop obligating yourself more than anyone deserves. Stop being at the beck and call of every “Hey (Insert Your Name Here), I need…, tweet, message and whim.
Success doesn’t come from a “To Do” list.
Success comes from a “Stop Doing” list.
Don’t those words feel glorious?
Well, try this:
Everybody needs a “Stop Doing” List.
Including You + Me
I will stop:
1. Skipping breakfast
2. Checking emails more than 2x a day
3. Missing sunsets
4. Making your urgency my emergency
5. Saying yes if it’s not a hayle yes
6. Performing tasks that can be delegated or outsourced.
7. Giving time to people who won’t grow
8. Waiting for Denzel to leave Paulette. Denzel, your time is up.
9. Taking early morning international flights
10. Giving discounts. On My Time + Services
11. Going to bed after midnight
Now, what will you stop doing? Like, right away.
Commit to it.
For bonus Karmic points: Encourage another Sister to join the “Stop Doing” revolution and share this post with them.